On friendship and gratitude

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to to trust you with a friendship. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have been thinking a lot about my friends recently – some of them back in Bulgaria, some even further away on other continents, and some I only have met in the internet space. No matter where they are, I feel supported.

And this post is my tribute to them.

To all of you who haven’t forgotten me after many years being away and almost no contact. And to all of you who have never even met me and still reaching out to connect.

I know I’m not alone and although I’ve isolated myself during the past years, I’ve never thought my friends will forget me. And I hope you forgive me as well, for not keeping in touch.

It’s only now that I find the will and strength to open up to the world again.

Only now I feel that perhaps I can talk about what has been happening to me these years.

Only now do I feel that I have the words for it.

And I’m hoping you would want to listen. I’m hoping it’s not too much to ask of you, to listen to my sorrow and grief. Because it’s still here. And I need to get it out of me, my friends. And you will have to help me.

Because only a real friend can listen, and just listen with their heart. And that’s all I need right now. I need you to let me back into your thoughts, your hearts.

And I know it’s not easy to let somebody else’s pain into your life. That’s why I kept it so long just for myself, to spare you that burden. But that burden doesn’t go away, I realised, if I just hold on to it. It gets heavier and heavier. I can barely hold it on my shoulders anymore.

We need each other as people. People need people. It’s the only way. I had to learn that the hard way. Believe me, I really thought I can do it by myself! I’ve been taught to be self-reliant in my life – I believe the worst lesson I got in life.

We’re not meant to go through it all just by ourselves, but on the contrary.

What I’m learning now is to open up and look for help. I’m learning to reach out, talk, share in a healthy way. I’m taking small steps but making tremendous changes in my life.

Thank you for listening.

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I'm Vilina Christoph and here I share my journey of healing and transformation. My awakening was triggered by the loss of both my sister and mother to cancer. When the feelings became too much to handle, I started documenting my experiences of dealing with depression and anxiety, coping with the loss and grief, and the general lack of motivation and joy in life.  I knew the only way out of the darkness was to embrace all my pain and transform it. I kept untangling my story by looking into early childhood experiences, past life traumas, studying astrology and psychology, meditating on regular basis and connecting with my Higher Self. Since the beginning of this journey of self-discovery I've learned self-acceptance and self-love. I've come to terms with who I am and how I feel. I've understood how my past experiences have affected but also that I'm not a victim of my circumstances.  My mission is to encourage others to look into their pain and take on the path of self-awareness and transformation. By accepting who you are with all your imperfections, by loving yourself fully with all your wounds, you find the strength to be your most authentic self and you unlock your unique gifts in the world.

3 thoughts on “On friendship and gratitude

  1. Well shared. I agree and although I tend to be self reliant I now understand how that is not the best. We isolate ourselves from friends and it creates a ripple effect so much that the isolate themselves also. Instead we can enjoy the understanding and support of a friend and give it also freely. I hope that all your friends everywhere can be a chair to support you and give you support when you need it. The last two weeks my health took a down turn and could not walk. My family was there for me as I tried to recover. Having a kidney transplant for a long time i am grateful and mostly i am well but 29 years is a long time for a recipient. I’m glad to feel their support and maybe soon I won’t even be limping.

    Like

    1. Hi, Dave (had to look through your blog to find your name ;)! I’m sorry to hear about your health but I’m sending you some positive energy from this side of the world! That’s what I mean when I say friends – no matter where they are – because most of the support I’m receiving now is through this blog! I thank you for sharing your thoughts with me and stopping by my blog every so often, this is friendship for me and it means a lot! I’m really hoping you recover soon and by the way I do love your short stories very much, I think you have a skill and a talent! Vilina

      Liked by 1 person

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