Memoir: Two

When I first looked I saw one line and instantly felt relief. But when I looked closer, I could barely see the pale second line.
It was positive.
I was sitting on the toilet seat in the bathroom and the reality of what was happening started hitting me.

I was pregnant.

Once the initial panic passed, I could feel an excitement. It wasn’t a bad thing, I thought. I do love him. Of all men I’ve been with, he’s the only one I would like to have children with.
I know we’ve been both silently thinking about it and agreeing on the possibility of it one day.
But that day was today and that was a surprise.
Those first days after the news were frantic and we found each other talking about future plans almost obsessively since we both didn’t know how to properly process the facts.
But the eagerness and willingness were in place, maybe a bit too much of it even.

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I'm Vilina Christoph and I write about my journey of healing and empowerment. A family tragedy triggered my suffering from depression and anxiety+panic attacks. I was consumed by loss and grief, my sense of self was shattered. For the last three years I've been slowly piecing a new "me". I've been tracing my steps backwards, unlearning toxic behaviours and releasing outdated beliefs. It's been a journey of stripping down layers and coming back to my core, my heart, my soul. This is my life story of awakening, remembering my truth and becoming whole again. May it inspires you on your path!

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