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I am the person I am today because of my trauma, not despite it
My biggest battle is accepting my childhood trauma and the effects it has had and continues to have on my life and its overall quality. More accurately, I struggle the most with accepting that because of my posttraumatic stress responses, my role as a mother has been impaired. As a victim of childhood abuse and trauma, I am especially sensitive towards the fact that because of my own “condition” my child is suffering too. I can easily go down the spiral of blaming myself for not being the mother I wish I could be, for the things I have done or haven’t done because I wasn’t well myself. Because I am…
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How my son starting school is helping me heal trauma
For the last more than three months now I’ve been through a whirlwind of a storm. I’ve never thought that my son staring school will bring so much up. More and more I realise how isolated I’ve been and how much I’ve lost contact with the outside world. More accurately, I’ve suspected that but the clash of reentering seems to be taking me much more effort and costing me much more energy than I’ve ever imagined. I know there are many reasons for this – I am and always have been a very sensitive person and being away from work for 8 years now has put me in a very…
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Interview with Shyla Cash: Narcissistic abuse and emotional neglect survivor, and a coach at Grow Heal Change
Shyla Cash is the life coach behind Grow Heal Change Coaching, a coaching practice that helps high-performers and creatives heal mind, body, and spirit. She believes childhood trauma can be a portal to experiencing our full potential. Shyla loves to witness the process of transformation as she guides her clients through the amazing journey into the life they desire. Her own trauma history involved a childhood filled with narcissistic abuse and emotional neglect. Through her own healing, she discovered the amazing ability for humans to transcend the pain of family dysfunction into confidence, personal power, resilience, and responsibility. Shyla just got married to her amazing husband Nathan, she loves to…
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Childhood emotional neglect – the hidden root of my pain
I just had my second EMDR therapy session. In EMDR we focus on a particular memory from our life – usually a traumatic one. I was working with an image of me when I was a child and my mother who was particularly unresponsive to my needs. Just to remind you, at the beginning of therapy my therapist confirmed that I was emotionally deprived/neglected as a child. Since then I read the book Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Dr Jonice Webb which further helped me understand my “diagnosis”. The book very well explains what emotional neglect is – it’s not about what happened but about what…
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Interview with Tanya Amidei: Sexual abuse survivor, life coach and a spiritual writer
Tanya is one of the beautiful people I’ve met on Instagram. Her posts are deep and poetic and full of wisdom and truth. Her personal story is truly poignant but her strength, her spirit and her faith have transformed her into the woman she is today. Tanya is a Life Coach and writer who lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado. She is engaged and lives with an invisible illness called Dysautonomia, more specifically Ehler Danlos and POTS. She describes herself as a people person and some have called her a catalyst for human growth because of her innate ability to see people’s potential. She is passionate, a natural leader, values-oriented, intuitive…
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My Pain is My Power
Two weeks ago I started seeing a therapist. During the two times we met, we talked and went over the details of my past. We started with memories from my childhood and moved towards the more recent past. We made a plan – a timeline of particularly traumatic experiences and we’re going to work with each memory and event separately. I haven’t had the opportunity to talk freely about my past and everything that has happened so far. I had a brief experience of therapy back in Ireland right after my sister died but at the time, I had no idea of the magnitude of traumatic stress I was experiencing.…
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The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of June
“Every day may not be a good day, but there is something good in every day.” ~ unknown & “People say ‘find the good one and leave the bad ones’. But I say ‘find good in people and ignore the bad in them’ because no one is perfect.” ~ unknown Hey Beautiful! It’s the month of June and we’re heading into summer with full speed. Personally, the last two weeks were emotional. My son and I had an unpleasant experience in his kindergarten and, if you’ve followed me for a while, you’ll know it’s not the first time. Things reached a culmination point and Tuesday last week was his…
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Interview with Dari Frampton: A woman on a journey of transformation, healing & discovering her true self
Dari is an old friend from my teenage years back in my hometown. For more than a decade I haven’t heard from her until one day in 2017 Dari got in touch with me while experiencing a personal crisis. She was on the verge of her own spiritual journey of self-discovery and awareness. Since that day, we’ve restored our connection and find ourselves on a very similar path of awakening and healing. By day Dari is a portrait and wedding photographer who loves capturing beautiful moments for people. She has always loved the creative arts but recently she’s grown a deep interest in studying psychology, astrology, ancient healing and wisdom…
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“If I only could make them happy…”
My inner journey of healing and discovery is reaching a turning point. For the past 5 years, I’ve been digging and going deeper and more inward like it was my job. And it was my full-time job – I’ve taken this task of nurturing self-understanding and awareness so seriously, it became my primary focus and priority. Layer by layer, I’ve been stripping old programmes, paradigms, and conditioning. I was determined to get to the core of things, to the root of all pain and ailments, emotional and psychological. Last year in September, I stumbled upon one piece of the puzzle – my mother had suffered from a mental condition and…
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The Wonder List: Goal, Gratitude, Inspiration & Affirmation for the Month of May
“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” ~ Morrie Schwartz Hey everyone! I can’t believe it’s already May and the spring is in full swing! In Bulgaria, this is one of the months with the most holidays and days off. I’m just back from some travelling in the country and some much needed reconnecting with nature. I spent a few days at my father’s house and if you’ve been following my posts, you know we have a “story” with him. Every time I visit, there is some unfolding and clarity gained and this time was no different.…