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You’re not alone in your pain
I’m crying but I’m happy. I’m happy because in the depths of my soul I am happy, happier than I’ve ever been. But I’m also crying and that’s because I’m crying out all the pain my mother, my sister, all the women in my family, and all the women in the world for centuries had felt. But I’m happy because I’m shifting all that pain. I’m crying because they couldn’t transform the pain, they felt it and lived with it till their very last breath. But I’m happy because they will be free, I am setting them, myself and the future generations free, now. From all that couldn’t be said,…
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A strange day… in a beautiful and vulnerable way
It’s a strange day today, in a beautiful, real, soulful, tender way. I’ll try and describe what I feel the best way I can. This morning I started reading a book – Untangled, A Story of Resilience, Courage, and Triumph. I found this author and her moving story “randomly” browsing in WordePress reader. When I opened Alexis’s blog and read a few blog posts, I knew I’ve found it for a reason. I was captivated. This is the story of a woman who has suffered extreme physical and sexual abuse as a young child and a teenager in the 60’s and 70’s in America. I only started reading this morning but the…
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A message from the goddess Isis
Last night I picked a card from my Goddess Guidance oracle cards. I picked Isis – Past Life: Your roots upon this planet are strong and deep, and some of the roots have anchored you in past memories from faraway times. These roots have anchored you so deeply, in fact, that you’re paralyzed when it comes to moving forward. I’ve called your attention to this condition so that you may unearth and uproot past memories. Some times you bury those memories to shield yourself from psychic pain or embarrassment, so you won’t remember those awkward moments when life tested you to the maximum. Reveal those lessons to yourself now, strong sorceress,…
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Breaking free of our mental prisons
I mentioned in my last post that I’ve kept myself into a sort of a mental prison. After talking to my therapist about it and going for a walk after, it came to me – another piece of the puzzle. After the dreams about my past lives, I had another few empowering dreams – one symbolising letting go of the burden I’ve been carrying by throwing things out of a backpack I’ve been carrying, and another – expressing myself freely by singing to a song I don’t remember the words of but nevertheless singing loudly and freely. To me, those dreams symbolise my emotional release of the trauma I’ve been lugging around…
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Past life explorations
Last time I put my story under a different light and illuminated it within a new perspective. I looked into my life from the angle of radical (self) forgiveness. In short, radical forgiveness is about the idea that whatever happened to us (seeing ourselves as victim) or whatever we did to someone else (seeing ourselves as perpetrator), nothing wrong ever occurred. The people participating in the event on both sides have agreed on spiritual level to experience it so their souls can evolve. It’s all perfect and as it should be. Thus, skipping the traditional meaning of forgiveness, we address our concerns to our spiritual self and forgive whomever hurt us or ourselves…
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Rewriting my story in a radical self-forgiveness context
“I am here to deal with my fear of isolation, loneliness and loss. I have chosen my parents, sibling, partner, child, close friends, and my life circumstances so they can support my soul’s evolution. My mother temporarily left me for 5 years when I was 10 years old. Then she permanently left my life when I was 26. By doing so, she first opened a hole in me as a young child, and then she made that hole graver, bigger and deeper by leaving this world altogether. When my mum first left she prepared me for encountering a greater feeling of loneliness and loss later in my life. When she…
