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Start of the school year and the nervous system
The start of the school year is pretty much the start of The Year for a parent. And here we are, another school year is beginning for our son in a few days. With all the arrangements and engagements around it, come all the stressors and negative emotions associated with it. Past experiences paint in black what’s to come in the future. It’s how trauma works. Trauma keeps you stuck in the past. Unresolved experiences and emotions from the past prevent you from moving forward and focusing on the here and now. Your nervous system is stuck in a threat response and focused purely on ensuring survival. It’s biologically not…
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A turning point on my healing journey – experiencing an emotional flashback and remembering my past
A few days ago I had my most intense emotional flashback. Now, if you don’t know what is an emotional flashback or what it feels like, you’re not alone. For sure, I’ve read about them in my research on childhood trauma and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) but I haven’t experienced one. Or at least I didn’t know at the time. An emotional flashback is an intense emotional reaction, many describe it as a sort of flooding of emotion, usually as a result of a trigger – an event, a situation, it could be something someone says, and how that makes you feel. Triggers could be many and they…
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I am the person I am today because of my trauma, not despite it
My biggest battle is accepting my childhood trauma and the effects it has had and continues to have on my life and its overall quality. More accurately, I struggle the most with accepting that because of my posttraumatic stress responses, my role as a mother has been impaired. As a victim of childhood abuse and trauma, I am especially sensitive towards the fact that because of my own “condition” my child is suffering too. I can easily go down the spiral of blaming myself for not being the mother I wish I could be, for the things I have done or haven’t done because I wasn’t well myself. Because I am…
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Interview with Tanya Amidei: Sexual abuse survivor, life coach and a spiritual writer
Tanya is one of the beautiful people I’ve met on Instagram. Her posts are deep and poetic and full of wisdom and truth. Her personal story is truly poignant but her strength, her spirit and her faith have transformed her into the woman she is today. Tanya is a Life Coach and writer who lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado. She is engaged and lives with an invisible illness called Dysautonomia, more specifically Ehler Danlos and POTS. She describes herself as a people person and some have called her a catalyst for human growth because of her innate ability to see people’s potential. She is passionate, a natural leader, values-oriented, intuitive…
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My Pain is My Power
Two weeks ago I started seeing a therapist. During the two times we met, we talked and went over the details of my past. We started with memories from my childhood and moved towards the more recent past. We made a plan – a timeline of particularly traumatic experiences and we’re going to work with each memory and event separately. I haven’t had the opportunity to talk freely about my past and everything that has happened so far. I had a brief experience of therapy back in Ireland right after my sister died but at the time, I had no idea of the magnitude of traumatic stress I was experiencing.…
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Interview with Amie Johnson: Trauma survivor and a host of The HeART of Healing podcast
I “met” with Amie via Instagram and instantly felt we have much in common. She’s recently come out of years of dealing with trauma symptoms and mental health (mis)diagnoses and is moving on in her healing journey. I always appreciate her heartfelt and honest posts, and find much wisdom in her words and story. Here are Amie’s own words: Tell us a little bit about your life journey. This question always gets me! I’ll give you the “nutshell version.” I was born and raised in a small, beach town in West Michigan. My childhood was a strange dichotomy of idyllic and awful. I had an emotionally and physically abusive dad, and…
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How trauma and codependency in childhood can cause toxic mommy guilt
I often question why I feel so much guilt as a mother towards my little boy. It’s not only crippling my own experience of being a mother but also sending inaccurate messages to my son which shape the way he views himself and the world. I feel stricken with guilt every time I feel the effects of my trauma. I blame myself for not being able to shake off the sadness or depression I feel, for the anger that sometimes I can’t hold or the negativity that my critical mind is keeping me a captive to. I feel shame every time I’m not at my best for letting my son down. When…
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Interview with Alexis Rose: Author of Untangled, a story of resilience, courage, and triumph
Today I am introducing a new feature on the blog – guest posts and interviews from other authors, writers and bloggers. These would normally be people who have been through and have overcome certain adversities in their lives. They will be sharing their stories, practices and messages of transformation. Our very first guest is Alexis Rose, an author of the incredible memoir Untangled, a story of resilience, courage, and triumph. I found Alexis’s blog and her articles instantly captivated me. I went on to buy and read her book too and since then I’ve been feeling very connected to her and her journey of transformation. Here are Alexis own words: Tell us…