Soul Searching

spider web

How did I get here? How did my consciousness and awareness come to this point?

It is interesting to go back a bit and mention my old posts again, from two years ago. I can notice a lot of things I am writing to be really close to an intuition which is even stronger today. I was subconsciously touching on some points which today are well developed in my mind. They are much clearer and defined, and that’s because I am conscious about these things. I have read and researched them, and in a way I know what’s going on.

I have to say that I am getting most of this knowledge from learning about astrology, karma and transformation, and how the planets in our solar system affect us in our lives. Every one of us is born with a unique “map” – his birth chart. This map is based on the exact location and time a person is born, but it also reflects this particular soul’s level of spiritual evolution. There are no two similar people on the earth even if they are born within a few seconds and/or in the same location. This map is also a guidebook with all the lessons which your incarnated soul needs to master. Based on the location of the planets in the sky at the time you were born and the aspects they make with each other, the birth chart is your own personal guide to spiritual growth. A very important point here is that your own soul decides the exact minute in which to be incarnated and also your parents, home, country of origin, etc. These carefully chosen factors reflect the possibilities of the particular lessons that need to be obtained.

Now that I have immersed myself in this knowledge I can see a lot of sense in the things that have happened to my in the recent years. And also all these events that have happened to me have led me to exploring the subject of astrology. Now I am conscious, I understand, not everything but certainly the main bits. And also I understand that you do need the perspective of time. Sometimes some of these effects take a decade to play themselves out. Sometimes they work on such a subtle level that you only see a change in yourself when you reach your thirties, sometimes later.

I don’t know if I would’ve been conscious of certain things in my life if I have followed a different path. And here’s the thing – there is no different path. In one way or another you come around those things which you need to find out about. Two years ago I did not know what I know now but I was certainly feeling it on some level. Now it’s put into words and organized in my mind. As I said, it makes sense why it all happened. And I know myself better. It doesn’t make it less hard or tough, no, but I get the bigger picture.

We are all here to learn from this human experience in the material plane. It’s a tough one. But it is worth it. We do need to keep our perspective and focus, though. Discipline is essential. And also finding a creative outlet for all those powerful energies to be channeled. Don’t bottle them up! And also know yourself – don’t be afraid of what you can find about yourself. We all suppress and repress feelings and emotions – from childhood, through adolescence, to the present day. Do the digging and let it go.

I was thinking recently lying in bed just before going to sleep – we are all so different from each other during the day. We all have our personalities, attitudes, beliefs, agendas, etc., that separate us from one another. But during the night, in those magical moments when we are the most of ourselves – the true us, not the roles we play in daylight – we are all the same. We are vulnerable, we are hurting, we are afraid… You know the feeling. And we all feel it.

We are all the same.

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I'm Vilina Christoph and here I share my journey of healing and transformation. My awakening was triggered by the loss of both my sister and mother to cancer. When the feelings became too much to handle, I started documenting my experiences of dealing with depression and anxiety, coping with the loss and grief, and the general lack of motivation and joy in life.  I knew the only way out of the darkness was to embrace all my pain and transform it. I kept untangling my story by looking into early childhood experiences, past life traumas, studying astrology and psychology, meditating on regular basis and connecting with my Higher Self. Since the beginning of this journey of self-discovery I've learned self-acceptance and self-love. I've come to terms with who I am and how I feel. I've understood how my past experiences have affected but also that I'm not a victim of my circumstances.  My mission is to encourage others to look into their pain and take on the path of self-awareness and transformation. By accepting who you are with all your imperfections, by loving yourself fully with all your wounds, you find the strength to be your most authentic self and you unlock your unique gifts in the world.

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